From my hubby....

(Somehow this never got posted. What a shame. Today is July 3, 2012 this was January 29, 2010 and Boy was 2 1/2 yo, he just turned 5 a few weeks ago *sigh*) 

Sometimes little boys can melt their daddy's hearts.....

……even better than a little girl can.

Last night, I needed to go look at an electrical project for a guy at work, and decided to go home and get Boy first, and have some special time, just he and I.  We were driving down the road talking about "higherhighdrance" (fire hydrants), trucks, radio towers, and many more things that I'm not even sure what they were.  The conversation got quiet, so I said "Boy, what do you want to be when you grow up".  I was expecting 'Bob the Builder' or 'Thomas the train' or 'a fireman' – something along those lines, but instead, he looked straight at me, took his thumb out of his mouth and simply said "like you, Dad" (thumb goes back in).  Tears welled up in my eyes, and I said "Oh thank you son, but I hope you grow up to be a much better man than Daddy."  He took his thumb back out and said "Me love you, though."  I realized last night that Boy understands much more than I, or anyone else probably gives him credit for. 

A beautiful, loving wife, 2 beautiful, precious girls, and a little man who has a tender heart, yet is a 'man's little man', and they all know Jesus loves them – I'm living my biggest dream.

*And I am a very bless woman ~Brandee*

I blew it!

So, you are waiting for the words of encouragement and Truth to oose from this post and touch a part that is needing to be touched? Me too. I really can't remember all that we talked about this week. I have gotten a good and much needed reprimand from Father this week and well that is where I am. When you are leading a class like this, your faults and selfishness come screaming out of the woodwork and stand face to face with you as you try to walk the same paths you have walked before. Let's look at my week:

Wednesday: Go to class and talk about thankfulness, gratitude, joy, and being, doing those things for our husband.

Thursday: I receive an email in my inbox that says "I have a surprise for you, Fed Ex tomorrow" Here is where I start the slipping and I didn't even realize it at the time, but my response was "is this for everyone or just for me?" The reason I chose this sentence is because I am selfish and my Darling Husband is not great with "surprises" as a matter of fact, he can't surprise me. I have to give him a list of things I would like for birthdays, Christmas, etc. He just doesn't have it in him to make mental notes. This is NOT bashing, it is plain truth. Ask him... I thought the next response was good, "Thank you , I love you" And I truly thought at the time that I was doing good and lifting my husband. Now I know it was the beginning of the evil one's attack on me and him.

Friday: I get home from the being out and see a huge box on my front porch. "Wow, the box is here, I'll just look and see who it's from and I can tell what it is." I thought. I looked and the address label and it was from a repairsomething.com type place. Now my wheels are spinning because maybe he has gotten one over on me... hhmm.

Alas, no, he has not, I realized it was the part for my washing machine that has been leaking for over a year. While I am grateful to have my machine fixed (I had to keep a tray in front of the thing to catch the water that would run out.), I just did not see this as a surprise for me. It was merely a maintenance item for the house. He, on the other hand, saw it as a big thing for me, I would not have to pour out the water every time I washed a load of clothes.

Now here is where I REALLY messed up. We go out to eat with my folks, he is there first and when we got there I say something very dumb like "ha, ha, that is not a surprise for me." [Please learn from this, ladies] He, of course, gets his feelings hurt and gets mad because his wife can't see that he was doing the man thing and fixing a problem in the house. And it was down hill for the entire meal.

I should see that his efforts to fix something are his way of helping/giving to me. I should have 'painted' that smile on and been gracious and happy with my husband's display of duty/love to me.

My challenge this week was to choose to be joyful at those times when we usually choose to scorn and disapprove. Well I have already blown that, but the good news is, just like His mercies are new every morning, I can start anew.

BTW, I did apologize and then I helped him put it on the washing machine yesterday. We have washed 2 loads and there is no water on the floor. Thank you John! I love you.

Are you his helper?

The title is a throw back to the book "Are you my mother". A little bird pops from his shell, alone in the nest he goes to find his mother. He asks all those in his path "Are you my mother?" At the end a Snort puts the bird back in his nest and his mother shows up. I guess I am praying for God to be our Snort... to put us back in our nest... only this time to see if we are the helper God has created us to be.

In class we discussed what a helper is... someone to encourage, trust, confide in and most important to come along side or assist.

How are we doing? Were we taught to assist our husbands? Did growing up in our generation influence the way we treat our husbands? Honestly, when was the last time a TV show portrayed a capable, hard working, wise father? The Cosby Show, 7th Heaven? Most were in the 60's and maybe even earlier. Leave it to Beaver and Andy Griffith Show come to my mind. Mostly men are portrayed as dumb, gluttonous, incapable men and sometimes not even existent! Have you thought about the way you treat your husband? Do you treat him like he is Ward Clever or Clark Griswold? Is the way we treat him helpful?

Also do we take a few minutes to actually help our husbands? I have to admit that there is something at my home I have waited almost 4 years for my husband to do... My thoughts were... "I'm gonna nag him forever about this. I can't believe he hasn't done that yet. I am over it, it can just stay that way." HHmm, that is NOT a help to my husband, really it is a selfish, self serving woman that thinks it's ok to think less of my husband when I myself am not willing to do the same thing. Truthfully, I am 100% capable of getting it done, without his help. I have just been passing judgement on him for the last 4 years. Shame on me!

God's Word says "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence, if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things" Phil 4:8. So does that include my husband? Of course it does! He has so many ways he takes care of me and the kids, who am I that I should dwell on his failures, I am to dwell on his strengths, the whatevers... the "if there is any". I think it means if I can search my mind and find ANY shred of positive attribute in him... I am to dwell on that!

Finally we were reminded that our husbands are sinners. (See Romans 3:23) As a matter of fact, you and I are sinners. Who are we to think our husbands are anything less than ourselves, sinners. Can you really be less than a sinner anyway? And if I'm a sinner, I must be faulty, therefore I must have issues too! You mean I don't have my own pedestal from which to order my mere mortal husband around from? Well, as the Word says in Ephesians, God is head of Christ, Christ is head of the Church, and the man is head of the woman. I just don't see a pedestal there.

This week's challenge: Make at least one change to be a helper to your husband. Make sure to record it in your journal and record any changes that happen. Even if your husband doesn't notice you can rest assured that the Father does!
Let the Son shine,
Brandee